Grand Parenting Tips

The desire to be a good grandparent is overwhelming, given the uniqueness of the relationship between grandchild and grandparent. If you wish to improve your skills as a grandparent, or merely garner ideas of how to best interact with your grandchild, here are a few hints and tips:

It is not always good to talk. Many advisors may suggest you try and talk to your grandchild, but unfortunately this creates a difficult atmosphere where a child often feels they are subject to some kind of interrogation. While the idea of sitting and talking deeply with your grandchild is understandably attractive, it has to happen naturally. Instead of expecting a rapport to already be in place, you can instead encourage the child to interact with you in other ways, such as playing together or making something. The conversation that happens during activity has two fold benefits; it is natural, and therefore the feeling of interrogation is minimized, and it also helps create a bond and level of communication that can be returned to.

Think like a child. Although it may be awhile since you have tried to do so, the best way to interact and develop a relationship with a child is to try and put yourself in their mindset. Try and ask yourself what children like, what they require, and how are they best stimulated. Your favorite hobby is probably not theirs, and the best way – particularly with young children – to bond is to see the world through their eyes. Encourage them to suggest activities, and provided these activities are safe, try and go along with them. This will help build a relationship between you and your grandchild, and they will associate you with fun, pleasant things.

Be aware of their likes and dislikes. Young children are particularly fussy when it comes to food, and while it is not advisable to roll out the ever popular junk food when your grandchildren come to stay, it is a good idea to remember their particular likes and dislikes. If they have a particular hatred of, for example tomatoes, write this down and don’t try and force them to eat tomatoes. Just remembering their little foibles will go a long way – but remember, children change their minds quickly, and what was flavor of the month the last time they visited may now be hated. Just roll with the punches and acknowledge this – admittedly frustrating – quick mind changing is just part of being a child.

Engage, do not preach. A sure fire way to make a child dislike your company is to preach to them – and not just in religious terms. Telling a child the benefits of healthy eating or the importance of exercise is not your job; it is their parents. Instead, make your role with the child fun and engaging, an authority figure who has the fun of not actually having to hand out discipline. Where necessary, chastise or inform them, but keep it short and succinct.

Find an activity just for the two of you. A huge benefit to being a grandparent is that you have more time than you did with your own children, and more free time than the child’s parents probably have. It is therefore a good idea to find an activity that you and your grandchild can do together, something that becomes ’your’ thing. Ensure it is something the child wants to do and you can do happily, and thankfully you will be better prepared to make time for this activity than most. Indulge in this chosen activity often, and soon the relationship between you and your grandchild will blossom.

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